Mysteries of Christmas

There are many mysteries surrounding the holiday season. Here are a few of the unanswered questions and strange events we often find ourselves wondering about.

What to Do With Infinite Money

People sometimes fantasize about what they'd do if they won the lottery or became rich in some other way. Aside from paying off bills and loans, there's also fun things. Such as moving to a private island with the eighty-three cats that will be your friends, like you've been threatening to do all these years.

Things That Bother Me

Everyone has things they find frustrating, or otherwise don't like. Sometimes it's major stuff, other times it's trivial. Today's blog post is about things that bug me. (Like Windows 8, for example.)

I don't like it.

The Never-Ending House Fire

Sometimes I have really weird dreams. Take, for example, the one I had a few nights ago.

I was at a family member's house, and she wasn't home at the time. She apparently had a baby, and a couple of people were babysitting him. At some point, they decided to go out for a while with the infant in tow.

A fire started in the house, and was spreading. When I realized the calamity, I tried to call 911. I kept hitting wrong keys, but finally succeeded in dialing the number.

Fear List

Last week, we discussed some fears I had as a child. This week, we're going to talk about some present-day fears. (Admittedly, some of these fears were around in childhood, too.)

Childhood Fears

As a child, I had a number of fears, some of them logical, and some of them... not so much. Today's blog post is about the rational and irrational fears from when I was younger.

The horror!!!

The Refrigerator Curse

Over the last few years, two of our refrigerators have chosen extremely inconvenient times to go out. I mean the sort of really bad time when it's most difficult to obtain a new one. Prepare a mug of glorious, lovely hot cocoa, then put your feet up and get comfortable, because there's some stories ahead.

(I mean, unless you're the sort of person who's easily grossed out by things. Then don't get hot cocoa, because I'll be complaining about spoiled food and describing it in depth.)

Why the English Language is Confusing

The English language has a variety of words whose meanings differ between regions and dialects. Today's blog post is dedicated to the confusing intricacies of this widely-spoken tongue. (Because nonsensical spelling and pronunciation rules just weren't enough.)

Unrealistic Things in Media

In things like TV shows, movies, or even commercials, you notice a lot of things that are illogical and unrealistic. Some of them are little things, but nonetheless, they certainly don't resemble reality.

The Desire For Acceptance

As humans, we have a general desire to be liked. With people we meet, we wonder what their impression is of us. Even with friends and family, we sometimes wonder how they view us.

We talk about something, and wonder how people interpret what we're saying. Sometimes we worry that we're not explaining something well, or that our words or actions might be misinterpreted. There are times when we feel comfortable in our own skin, and times when we think, "I just said the stupidest thing ever, and I have to go dig a hole now and hide in it forever."

'Sarah's Scribbles' by Sarah Andersen.

Labelling Writing Notes

As a writer, I have a lot of files that are dedicated to random notes. Some of them have perfectly logical names, like "Joseline characters" or "short story outlines". Others are a tad more... odd. Below are some notes relating to stories and blog posts.

Considering this is what I name some of my general notes and reminders, you can imagine what the writing-related ones look like.

Working Titles

When starting stories or blog posts, I sometimes give them the most ridiculous or silly titles. But it's so much fun, how can I resist? So, I thought I'd make a compilation of some of these gems for your amusement.

Museum of Placeholder Names

During the writing process, you sometimes need to name things, like a place or a character, but have nothing in mind. So you write a placeholder, often crummy and lacking in originality, then leave it there until you have something better. Other times, you write what you thought was a permanent name, then change your mind later. Here's a list of placeholders and rejected names, along with their origins.

Conflicting Rules of Languages

There's plenty of variety among various languages. In some ways, the rules of two languages might not seem too different from each other. Other times, what occurs in one tongue is a totally foreign concept in another.

Personify the languages, imagine them having linguistics-related debates, and you get... today's blog post. Enjoy the insane ramblings of my brain.

Why I'd Be a Good Parent

Last week, we discussed reasons I fear I might not be a great parent, complete with my exaggerations and self-depreciating humor. This week, we'll talk about why I might potentially do a decent job of parenting.

Granted, the below image probably isn't it. Didn't you just hate when your evil parent came into your room in the morning, acting far too chipper for such an early hour, and then made you get ready for school?

'Hedger Humor' comic by Adrienne Hedger.

Why I'd Be a Bad Parent

Yep, I'm doing yet another two-parter. Today's post is about the dark side of my grumpy, impatient self. And next week, we'll talk about the hypothetical scenario in which I actually live up to the high standards I have in my mind.

Or, in less sarcastic, self-depreciating terms, today's post is about why I might not be good at raising young humans, and next week's post is about why they might grow up without too much emotional scarring.

Dumb Ways People Are Injured

Last week, I mentioned some weird or absurd ways I managed to get hurt. This week, we'll discuss stories other people have shared about clumsiness, poor judgment, or just plain bad luck.

Dumb Ways I've Been Injured

I've seen lots of threads on social media and forums, asking people to relay some of the dumbest and strangest ways they've been injured. So, I thought I'd make a post dedicated to all the lame ways I've been maimed. (Usually as a result of me being foolish.)

The Writing Muse

Ah, the muse. The thing which causes brilliant ideas to appear in your head, which you are then inspired to turn into reality. These strokes of inspiration can be caused by many things. Let's delve into the sources of the muse, shall we?

Excuses For Complaining

Sometimes we get annoyed with things, and we just want to rage about it. Our anger isn't always proportionate to what we're upset about, but we're still furious, and we try to justify our reaction when someone points out the unpleasant fact.

'Itchy Feet' comic by Malachi Ray Rempen.

Advantages of Having a Smartphone

Last week, we discussed the advantages of flip phones. Smaller price, increased durability... But what about smartphones? Certainly they have their advantages over flip phones, or we wouldn't see so many people walking around with smartphones.
Every smartphone user:  Well, duh.

Er, anyway, on to the blog post. Today we'll be talking about the advantages of smartphones.

Advantages of Having a Flip Phone

Smartphones or flip phones? Both come with their advantages and disadvantages. Today, we'll be discussing some of the advantages of purchasing a flip phone.

Adam and Eve Learn by Trial and Error

Random thought: it's amazing some of the earliest people lived to be several hundred years old. After being kicked out of Eden, there was a lot to figure out. They had to learn how to survive, and I imagine there would be a lot of mistakes along the way. The earliest generations would probably encounter a lot of problems.

Overrated Things

Some things just aren't as great as the hype surrounding them might suggest. Like, why is this is so popular? It's not all that. Seriously.

Underrated Things

There are some things that are just really awesome, and it's surprising that they're not more popular. Maybe it's a video game from years ago, or a cool concept from your childhood.

I may have played this game a few hundred thousand times as a kid.

Pen Pals

Throughout my life, I've heard of a curious concept known as having a pen pal. People who have never met correspond to each other through postal mail. In the 'Peanuts' comic strips by Charles Schultz, Charlie Brown has a pen pal (or pencil pal, since he always smudges the ink when using a pen) from another country, and tells them all about his life. In 'Julie of the Wolves' by Jean Craigshead George, Julie has a pen pal as well, and they share things about themselves.

Poor Charlie Brown, everyone's always picking on him.

Tuning Out the World

Sometimes, we get really focused on something. Maybe it's a project we're working on, or an interesting novel. At times, we get so 'in the zone', we fail to notice the world around us. Today's post is about some prime examples of this.

Lobster

My brother has worked as a cook or chef at several places. In one job he had, they prepared a lot of seafood, so he spent a fair amount of time working with lobster. Often, he would come home from work smelling of it. He eventually became sick of lobster, and hated when he had to prepare it.

When he left that job, he ended up throwing away his work shoes. No matter what he did, he couldn't get the lobster smell out of them, and he finally gave up.

So when I saw this post, I couldn't help but think of my brother. I ought to send the link to him, I know he'll enjoy it... (evil laughter)

Objects With an Attitude

Sometimes, inanimate objects seem to have a mind of their own. And sometimes, they insist on being as contrary as possible. There seems no other logical conclusion; they're obviously doing this on purpose.

Interact With Me!

I keep thinking, "I need to write." I have a novel to rewrite, another fifty novels to continue working on, and approximately forty million short stories that I've yet to finish. I have so many options to choose from. Yet every time I plan to actually do it, I want to procrastinate. I don't want to work on the scene I'm currently on. Everything else in the entire world suddenly becomes more interesting.

Things I Learned From Playing Neopets

Back in late 2003, when I was short and still believed I could find a leprechaun on St. Patrick's Day, I came across these battery-operated creatures in the toy aisles of a store. They looked cool, so naturally, I wanted one. I chose a red scorchio, which looked like a little dragon.

Upon opening the package, I found that there was a website relating to this toy. A virtual pet site, to be exact, where one could adopt these creatures and explore a virtual world. I remember Mom helping me to create an account. At the time, my favorite stuffed animal was a little gray cat called Meow, and I had recently acquired a toy dog I named Mocha, after the dog of a family we knew. My mother suggested 'Meowmocha' as a username. (Which, as you can see, I've used on other sites since then.)
With my account created, and my scorchio by my side, the Neopets saga began. A long, exciting saga which has yet to end. And looking at the years I've spent playing it, I realize I've learned a few things from being there.

What An Online Writing Group Taught Me

Years ago, I joined a writing guild on Neopets. It seemed like it might be a good way to meet fellow writers, and chat about writing. The guild eventually became inactive, but in the years I was in it, that writing group helped me improve as a writer and introduced me to a lot of new things.

Unexpected Call

My friend is getting married, and asked if I wanted to be a bridesmaid. I found a dress, got it fitted, and was going to pick it up. But then the virus outbreak said, "Nope." The wedding is postponed, and the bridal shop is closed. I got a voicemail saying that they would call me later about arranging to have the dress delivered to my house.

Now, I have all my contacts set to a custom ringtone, and my default ringtone is 'no ring'. After answering wrong numbers (I've had this phone for two years, quit calling for Angie or so help me...) and automated messages that are the phone equivalent of spam mail, I got tired of it. Plus, there's nothing like having your cell phone ring early in the morning, waking you from a dead sleep, just to hear a recording of "This is Travel Rewards Service, calling for what's probably a scam."

But considering I was waiting for David's Bridal to call, and wasn't sure if they'd use the same number or call from a different one, I changed my default ringtone so I would hear it if an unfamiliar number phoned me. And I had to wait for them to call; I tried calling them back, but only got a recording about the stores being closed, with no option to speak with anyone or even leave a message.

(tumbleweeds roll by, because nobody's here at David's Bridal)

Checking Social Media

I've made a fair number of observations while scrolling through my feed on various social media websites. Some are funny, others weird. Below are some examples of this.

Out-Of-Context Quotes

Let's face it, some of our conversations with people can get pretty crazy. Or maybe they don't have to be weird in order to create... quotes that sound really bizarre or nonsensical without context. The sort of thing where if someone were to walk in mid-conversation, they would hear something like "Why are you boiling noils?" Or maybe "I'm going to have to turn on my trees." What does any of this even mean?

Observations About HGTV

Sometimes my family will watch shows where people are looking for homes, or have their house renovated. At times, problems arise, either because of poor planning, unexpected problems, or the people on the show being impossible.

Library Garden- part 2

In early March, I walked to the library, which has a garden and park area next to it. I intended to just take a few pictures on my phone, but then I got a bit carried away. So without further ado, enjoy every random springtime flower, tree, bush, and rock that caught my fancy.

You can find my earlier library garden post here.

Life During Quarantine

I've been seeing a lot of memes about the exciting life of people in quarantine. On top of that, 'Hedger Humor' has been making comics about 'scenes from self-isolation'. This inspired me to compile some of the thoughts and anecdotes relating to life right now.

Chapter Titles

While writing, I sometimes get silly. This can result in a weird placeholder for that one guy a character mentioned, a document with a ridiculous name, or a chapter title that's just plain hilarious. Below is a compilation of the most random things I've named my chapters.

April Fools on Discord

As you know, the first day of April is known as April Fools' Day. It's a day of trickery, of pranks and diabolical schemes. Last April, one of my online friends on Discord decided to cause chaos, which soon led to full-scale insanity.

Quarantine

My brain is a never-ending stream of "I should be doing this." I need to get out more. I need to find more people around my age. I need to start making more friends. I need to write more, I need to stop writing my blog posts last-minute (it's Tuesday night right now, and my blog post comes out seven hours from now). I need to go back to volunteering at the shelter, apply to more jobs. I need to do this, I need to do that.

After my internal monologue about the things I ought to be doing, guess what usually happens? I don't do it. "I'm not in the mood to write at the moment," I say. "I'll do it at a better, more convenient time," I tell myself. On and on it goes, and I don't do stuff half as much as I feel I should. On top of that, as my general mood gets worse, my desire to do things decreases. There are times when I just don't feel like doing anything.

Misheard Lyrics

Sometimes when listening to music, we hear different lyrics than what are actually sung. Whether it's words vastly different from the real ones (How did we even hear that?), nonsense, or Siamese triplets named Emily, interesting blunders occur from mishearing a song. Below are some examples.

Things More Fun With Friends

The thing about a good friend is that you just like hanging out with them. Whether it's a birthday party, going to a movie theater, playing video games, or laughing as you beat them at 'Sorry!', things are more fun with them around.
But it's not just about the fun activities like holding a pillow fight (despite your parents instructing the horde of eight-years-olds to go to bed approximately 8,000,000 times). It's also about making even the mundane things more enjoyable. You have to buy paper towels and canned corn? Having your friend with you will make the journey to WinCo more interesting. And oh boy, they're heading to the hardware store tomorrow. You'd better tag along to provide them with conversation while they purchase those super-exciting nails and screws.

Writing Problems

Over time, I've encountered many issues during the writing process. Sometimes it's writer's block, or making mistakes, or finding giant plot holes. If you're a writer, you can relate. Or if you have a sense of humor, you'd probably get a laugh out of the insanity and chaos.
Either way, here's a compilation of my struggles and thoughts regarding writing.

Translation Fails

When it comes to translating things, or trying to use another language, some interesting errors can occur. Maybe they're made by people, or perhaps technology's lame attempts to convert one tongue into another. For this week's post, I've gathered some examples of the phenomenon.

Books That Make People Cry

Earlier, I wrote a blog post about movies that often bring on the waterworks. But what about books that tug on the heartstrings? (And the tear ducts.) Today's post will list a few of those notorious novels.

Note that this post will contain book spoilers, so blog readers beware.

Artificial Intelligence in Games

The characters in video games sometimes have programming to make them 'smart'. Unfortunately, this doesn't always work out well, and artificial intelligence becomes artificial unintelligence. Below is a compilation of funny and/or annoying examples.

Fails and Doofus Things

We've all made some ridiculous mistakes in our lives. Some of them are embarrassing, and others are humorous. For this week's blog post, I've compiled examples of when people have committed amusing fails.

How to Tell You're Celtic-Obsessed

We all have our interests, or even obsessions. Take Celtic stuff, for instance. Many people are fascinated with the history, culture, and languages. The question is, how do you know if you're simply interested in a concept, or outright obsessed with it? Well, thanks to this handy-dandy list, now you can know.

Weird Things You See in Public

Sometimes you come across some truly bizarre sights. Whether it's on the streets, in a store, or on the bus, weird things are occasionally spotted. This week, we'll explore some examples of this.

Mornings With a Cat

Recently, I was pet-sitting at someone's house. I was lying in bed asleep, and having an odd dream. Me, my mother, and a friend were doing something. Then Mom and I were about to leave in the car. We had a neighbor, a woman who was like a maternal figure to my friend, and my friend was going to stay at her house.

The friend asked if she could come with me. Thinking she meant walking with me to the car, I said yes. Instead, she got into the back seat with me, and we left.

"Wait, did you even tell her that you were going with us?" I asked.

My friend replied that she hadn't. I suggested calling our neighbor to let her know. I was trying to dial the number, but had the wrong area code the first time, and had to start over. Realizing I forgot the last part of the phone number, I asked, "What were the last four numbers?" Everyone was either giving no reply, or answering with something cryptic and nonsensical. "Fine, never mind then." I finally said in exasperation.

Lost and Found

Several months ago, my mother and I went on a trip. She withdrew some money so she'd have cash for the trip. However, the money was misplaced prior to leaving. We looked around for it, but could find no trace of the elusive green bills. Finally, we gave up on finding it, and Mom was disappointed that she lost such a sum.

Fast forward to Christmastime. We opened gifts at my aunt's house, and upon leaving to go home, we put our presents in bags for easier transport. Later on, Mom looked through the bag, and discovered one of the small gifts was missing. She hunted for it, and asked my aunt if an unclaimed gift had been found at the house, but without luck. To her greater frustration, she soon realized that she had lost not one, but two things.

Signs You're Behind On Writing

Sometimes, you're writing at an incredible pace. Millions and billions of words flow from your fingertips, and you have twenty pages written in a matter of days.
Other times, you just can't get much done. You're not in the mood to work on any of your stories or blog post drafts, you can't focus on anything, or you procrastinate to no end. Here are some signs that you may have fallen too far behind.