Saturday, October 31, 2015

Talky Tina

In episode 126 of 'The Twilight Zone', a little girl receives a doll named Talky Tina. The step-father is hostile toward the little girl and also hates the doll, and to his shock, the doll begins saying threatening things to him. My friend and I have both watched this episode, and she finds the doll to be rather creepy, which brings me to my story.
My friend's mother was driving the car, my friend was in the front passenger seat, and I was directly behind my friend in the back seat. We had just left Bible study that evening, and it was dark as we headed down the road. My friend and I were discussing the 'Talky Tina' episode, and how my friend found the doll featured in it to be creepy. Joking around, I said, "Hello, my name is Talky Tina, and I'm going to kill you." just as the doll did in the show, then acted like I was going to put my hands around my friend's neck.
To my surprise, my friend screamed and lurched forward in her seat. Her mother's hearing may never be the same again in her right ear, and I might have unintentionally frightened a few years from my friend's life.
This is why my friend doesn't watch horror films.

Friday, October 30, 2015

Choose Words Carefully

A few days ago, I looked up to see a scorpion sitting on the ceiling, next to the wall. I grumbled to myself, "Great, a scorpion. I don't like scorpions. Scorpions are icky. I don't want to see a scorpion."
A moment later, the scorpion turned around and crawled into a crevice in the wall, vanishing from sight.
I need to choose my words more carefully. For all I know, that scorpion is still in the house, alive and well.

Monday, October 26, 2015

Motivations to Exercise

For many people, playing a video game or staring at the television while eating chips is preferable to physical exertion. In this post, I've compiled a list of things which can motivate even the couch potato to exercise.

Thursday, October 22, 2015

The Truth About Famous People

We often read books, watch TV shows, or listen to songs. But have you ever wondered what it might be like to actually meet some of these people? Would it be as you expected, or would these people be entirely different from what you had thought?
Imagine for a moment that you're arriving at a house, and a man and woman come out to meet you. "I'm Mrs. King. It's a real pleasure to meet you." the woman says, shaking your hand. "And this is my husband, Stephen. He's a bit disturbed, so try not to make any sudden movements." Then Stephen King cackles like a madman.
Or perhaps you're arriving at the house of a brilliant person who believes in peace across the nations, and that people should get more in touch with nature and less in touch with staring mindlessly at electronics. Naturally, you're dying to meet this person and tell him how much you admire him. Upon knocking, one of his friends answers the door. "Oh, you wanted to meet him? That's great! We're in here, having a marathon of 'Halo 2'. We've been at it for nine hours so far. Hey, Thom, use the hand grenade! Watch out, he's going to blast you to smithereens!"
Maybe you're meeting that actor in those action movies. He does his own stunts, balks at no thing regardless of how reckless or dangerous it is, and is absolutely cool. Finally the moment arrives, and you get to meet this person. Then he sees a tiny daddy long-legs, screams like a girl, and runs out the door, never to be seen again.
There's a person who's written cookbooks for how to make homemade candies and cupcakes. They've also published a series of children's books about unicorns, which your niece loves. You're rather excited to meet this person. You arrive and search for them, but all you see is a man wearing a leather jacket, camouflage cargo pants, and at least a dozen piercings. He's also 6'10, looks like he's been training at the gym since he could walk, and is covered in tattoos. Despite how intimidating the man looks, you decide to ask him where the author is. He pauses from sharpening his machete, looks up at you, and replies in a gruff voice, "I'm him."

Sunday, October 18, 2015

How To Humiliate Yourself

Throughout our lives, we witness many blunders, or make some of our own. Today I will list off a few things that are important not to do in order to prevent embarrassment.

Saturday, October 3, 2015

The Tax Collector

In Luke 18:9-14, Jesus tells a story about a Pharisee and a tax collector. The Pharisee enters the temple and prays to God. It is obvious by his words that he feels he is more righteous than most any other man, and he acts haughty.
The tax collector, however, does not enter the temple at all. Instead, he stands at a distance from it. He does not even look up toward Heaven, but simply beats his chest and cries out, "God, have mercy on me, a sinner."
Lately the tax collector in that story has entered my mind a lot. No matter what, we are still sinners. Even when we want to follow God, our laziness, our wickedness, our very flawed natures get in the way of it. We feel unworthy, and nothing we do is good enough, even when we try. At times we feel like the tax collector. We do not even feel worthy of entering the temple or being near it, or worthy to even look God in the eye. We bow our heads in shame, we lower our eyes, and make a simple plea in our wretchedness.
Sometimes all we have in us is a cry for forgiveness, even though we deserve nothing. Sometimes the only way we feel worthy enough is to admit to ourselves that we will never be worthy enough. Sometimes the closest thing we can do to truly comprehending God's greatness, is to confess that we will never truly comprehend His greatness.
I am the wretch, I am the unworthy sinner, I am the unrighteous wrongdoer. I don't try hard enough, and I will never be good enough. I stray from what is good, I am not thankful enough, I do not understand God enough. All I have is a piteous plea for mercy.
I am the tax collector.