Adulting

As kids, we imagine what it would be like to be an adult, and the expectations are different from reality. We find ourselves thinking, "I'm not an adult! I'm still too immature and irresponsible and clueless to be an adult!" We also realize this wasn't what we signed up for. This is hard, and more demanding than we had anticipated. All those daydreams about being a grown-up were silly, impossible fantasies.

Below are some of the realities we face when we grow up and find ourselves forced to act like an adult.

1. Wanting to eat dinner, but being too lazy to make something, so you graze on random junk and call it a meal. Don't tell your mother you had leftover garlic bread, two strawberries, and some M&Ms for dinner.
   
2. Wanting to whine over trivial things or throw a tantrum.
3. Wanting to ask someone for help with a thing you should be perfectly capable of accomplishing, or wanting somebody to do it for you.
4. The people your age, who you went to school with, are suddenly married and have kids. You can't fathom it, because you could have sworn you were all kids, and because these people are farther into the adult world than you.
5. Not washing the stuff in the sink because you have to empty the dishwasher first.
6. The dishwasher is empty, but you still don't want to deal with the dirty dishes in the sink.
7. Discovering you ran out of forks and spoons, and only have one clean plate left, because you've avoided washing up for a shameful length of time.

   

   'For Better or For Worse' comic strip by Lynn Johnston.

8. When the smoke alarm is chirping for some reason, and you wish somebody else would take care of it so you don't have to cease listening to music and writing a blog post in order to stop the noise.
9. When you wish you were ten again so you could be innocent and not know the truths of the world.
10. When your attempts to do something end up like this. 
11. All those things grown-ups are supposed to know how to do? You have no clue where to even begin. Now, which thing on the debit card is the CVV number I need to buy this thing online? Great, I'll have to Google it. Again...
12. To avoid washing a plate, you eat your strawberries over the kitchen sink. I mean, you had to rinse them off anyway, might as well eat them while you're there.
13. Putting the opened can of olives into the fridge for the same reason. Why dirty a container?
14. When you thought you were done with those stressful tests when you got out of school, but then you realize adulthood requires filling out forms, which feels about the same.
15. When this happens.
    
    
16. You're house-sitting, and you brace standing on the stool to water the hanging plants as requested, even though you hate heights.
17. When someone asks what you're drinking, and you tell them, "A calcium-enriched beverage with cacao flavoring." Because now that you're a grown-up, you have to drink sophisticated adult stuff instead of childish chocolate milk.
18. You outgrew cartoons years ago, but then your younger cousins are watching 'SpongeBob SquarePants', and you find yourself laughing at it. Honestly, you could have sworn you were mature...
19. You used to be disappointed about getting clothes as a Christmas present, and now you love it.
20. Instead of asking for a FurReal toy that does tricks, you want free maid service so you never have to clean the toilet again.
21. You want something to eat, and upon entering the kitchen, you encounter this.
    
22. You plan to accomplish a bunch of stuff in your writing, and all you did today was a couple of minor edits between chatting online and watching YouTube. Then you give up and embrace the unproductiveness by reading a library book.
23. When your parents aren't around, you can sit in the dark without being told, "Turn a light on!"