Normal People Vs. Fantasy Writers

Ah, writers. They research random bits of information, babble incoherently about their characters, and think everything in the universe is fodder for their writing. Fantasy writers are even worse. They laugh maniacally while learning to say 'gryphon' in several different languages, wave a stick at something like it's a wand (unfortunately, nothing's levitated yet), think reading about pterosaurs is a good way to research dragons, and believe in doing everything the hard way.

Below are some comparisons between normal people and insane fantasy writers.

Normal Person:  My dream ride is a '37 Packard.

Fantasy Writer:  My dream ride is a Norwegian Ridgeback Dragon.

Normal Person:  Advises people to look before they leap.

Fantasy Writer:  I jumped into the Hole of Difficulty, and I'm still falling, have been for two years now, and it's so fun!

Normal Person: Puts English words together, or makes up something cool-sounding, in order to name a fictional place.

Fantasy Writer:  Looks up spelling and pronunciation rules of another language to name a place.

Normal Person:  Says wise things like, "Don't count your chickens before they hatch."

Fantasy Writer:  Says wise things like, "Never laugh at a dragon."

Normal Person:  Thinks the image below is cool.

Fantasy Writer:  Thinks this would be perfect for a high fantasy novel they're writing.

Normal Person:  Oh, this is cool. Pictures of hidden rooms.

Fantasy Writer:  My characters need one of these. In the royal palace. The queen can hide stuff in that room. And then there'll be unsolved mysteries for decades. And then...

Normal Person:  I'll call my newborn child Carol, after my aunt.

Fantasy Writer:  I'll call my newborn child Lúthien, after the brave elf maiden.

Normal Person:  Coos over puppies and kittens.

Fantasy Writer:  Coos over baby dragons.

Normal Person:  Watches a music video and enjoys it.

Fantasy Writer: Watches a music video and thinks the tops of a band member's ears look sort of pointed, like an elf's.

Normal Person:  Knows world geography.

Fantasy Writer:  Knows the geography of Narnia.

Normal Person:  Angers the spell-checker with typos and spelling mistakes.

Fantasy Writer: Angers the spell-checker with unusual character names and hard-to-pronounce kingdoms.

Normal Person:  Sees a delicious Thanksgiving dinner.

Fantasy Writer:  

Normal Person:  Thinks the cloud looks like a cow.

Fantasy Writer:  Thinks the cloud looks like an elfin warrior riding a unicorn.

Normal Person:  Researches bridles and harnesses for horses. 

Fantasy Writer: Invents harnesses and restraints for hitching winged creatures to a plough or wagon.

Normal Person:  Something reminds them of that funny conversation they had with their friends.

Fantasy Writer:  Something reminds them of the time when the baby dragon stole a sock and ran off with it, and the two characters chased after him as clumsily as Abbott and Costello.

Normal Person:  Cares about the history lesson when there's an interesting story or fascinating person involved.

Fantasy Writer:  Cares about the history lesson when it provides inspiration for world-building, plot events, or character development.

Normal Person:  Reads a book.

Fantasy Writer:  Obsesses over every detail, thinks about the aspects of the story that they like and dislike, and contemplates ways to improve their own stories. They wonder about the process involved in the naming, setting, culture. etc.

Normal Person:  Follows a blog about prehistoric creatures in order to learn more about them.

Fantasy Writer: Follows a blog about prehistoric creatures in order to learn about them and apply this knowledge to the fauna in your fantasy setting.

Normal Person:  Says, "Drat, I left my book report for school in the burning house. Oh well, it's not really that important."

Fantasy Writer:  Reacts this way.