Wednesday, May 1, 2019

Texas Chainsaw Massacre Inn

Mom and I were travelling to a see a friend of mine graduate, and visit my brother. It was getting late in the day, and we wanted to find a hotel soon and get something to eat. For a while, we seemed to be having no luck; either there were no hotels around, or the signs promised lodging ahead... only for us to drive through and be unable to find it.
Finally, in La Pine, Oregon, we saw a place called Timbercrest Inn. Even better, a pizza place was right next to it. Convenient, right? Glad to have finally found a place to sleep for the night, we parked and walked into the office.

Pepperoni pizza

After waiting a moment, a guy came out, seemingly from one of the hotel rooms (Maybe he was cleaning it or something?) and checked us in. That done, we went back to the car, unloaded some of our stuff, and put it in the room. The guy was standing outside, and it felt like he was hovering as I took things out of the vehicle, much to my annoyance.
The room was less than impressive. The refrigerator didn't work, a knob was missing from the rather loud air conditioner, and the moth-eaten curtains had sizable holes. Privacy is overrated, anyway. For some unfathomable reason, there was no clock. Which begs the question, what hotel room doesn't have a clock? Also, there was a square piece of wall with a wooden panel of some sort. I thought it might be a cabinet, but it didn't open. In fact, the weird wood panel had screws holding it shut. Perhaps part of the neighboring room? But our room didn't have a little space matching it. A water heater? But why would it be held in with several screws, then?
Speaking of neighboring rooms, our room was actually an adjoining room. Now, the two adjoining rooms can technically be done separately, and it's no problem. But the door was weird. On our side, it had a deadlock and no knob. At least the front door of our room is a bit better... oh wait, the bar lock doesn't actually work! Just a silly little decoration, completely ineffective if someone was trying to break in.

Swing bar lock

As we sat there in our crummy room, Mom commented that there were no rules posted, no fire escape map, and nothing was mentioned about a checkout time. Plus the adjoining door was weird, and the bar lock didn't work. And the guy had come out of the room next to ours to check us in, leading her to think perhaps he was staying in that room.
"I don't want to stay here." Mom said. "This place gives me the heebie-jeebies."
I commented on how the guy had been standing around while I unloaded. After discussing it a bit, we decided to just check out, and find somewhere better to stay. So we gathered our belongings, put them in the car again, and I headed towards the office. The guy wasn't inside, but I saw a key return box, so I just dropped our room key in there. I got into the car, and as we prepared to leave the perfect setting for a Stephen King novel, we saw the guy come out of the same room as before.

We had ordered chicken and potatoes from Ponderosa Pizza already, so we headed over there. After waiting a while for the order, I brought the food to the table and we prepared to eat.
The potatoes were cut in medallion shapes... and they were nothing like any sort of fries or potato wedges you'd want to eat. Mom ate most of one, and that was more than enough for her. I took two bites, and I was done with them too. The chicken was greasy and the meat kind of dry. We basically ate it because we were famished by that point. But we didn't eat much of it, and certainly not with any level of enthusiasm.

After we finished bailing from Hole-in-the-Wall Inn and having a disappointing dinner at Hole-in-the-Wall Pizza, we hit the road again. We drove a little while, and then to our great relief, we saw a Best Western. Needless to say, we stopped there.

Best Western hotel chain
Wonder of wonders, miracle of miracles...

Upon checking in, we told the lady at the front desk that we had come from Timbercrest Inn... and left there. At this, she made a face and said, "Yeah, I know that place." (ominous music)
And on our way out (We didn't get robbed, assaulted, or killed during the night, isn't that great?), we mentioned it to the man at the desk, and he said he'd heard a lot of negative things about it.

So... yeah. That was our experience with possibly avoiding a reenactment of 'Texas Chainsaw Massacre' (as Mom so aptly named it), and eating an awful dinner. But hey, if you wanted any inspiration for a horror and/or crime story, or a description of a bad meal, there you go.

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