How to Identify a Nerd

A list of ways to determine if you or someone you know is secretly a geek.

1. They use strange technological terms that no one else understands. (Ex: "So I debugged the hard drive, reinstalled the driver, then overclocked the processor.")
2. They know what Hypertext Markup Language is and how to use it.
3. They can disassemble, repair, and reassemble a complex gizmo as though it's as easy as breathing.
4. They programmed your garage door opener to turn your neighbor's television on and off.
5. They use unusual references to pinpoint when certain events occurred. (Ex: "My eighth birthday party was shortly after the Nintendo DS was released.")
6. They sometimes start their chat posts with "ooc:".
7. Their version of a wild party is having a video game marathon with their friends all night.
8. They carry an NES Zapper with them for protection.
9. Their role model is a character from the 'Dragon Warrior' series.
10. They consider their greatest achievement to be obtaining ten shiny Pokemon.
11. They know what all those strange buttons on the DVD remote do.
12. They spend seven hours making ASCII art.
13. They often reference characters from online games in everyday conversation.
14. They reward themselves for achievements by buying an upgrade for their computer.
15. They are fluent in Klingon.
16. They consider a great but exhausting weekend to be binge-watching 'Star Trek'.
17. They programmed your car to play the 'Barney' theme song non-stop while a dinosaur dances around on the screen, as an April Fools' prank.
18. They drive a hovercraft they built, rather than a regular car.
19. They celebrate major holidays like Bill Gates' birthday, and the anniversary of Nintendo.
20. They repaired your radio, and it now picks up signals from all over the world.
21. They give their child this to read.